Up, close and personal

Pues toma tres tazas, o eso es lo que a mí me decían en casa. Por falta de tiempo, no suelo actualizar mucho este blog (llegué a la conclusión de que tardo menos subiendo un dibujo diario al otro que escribiendo parrafadas), pero hay cosas que claman al Cielo. La última, por así decirlo, es la más que polémica ley norteamericana SOPA (y su amiga la Pepa, digo la PIPA), que Quino narra magistralmente en esta infografía.

A efectos de entendernos, la idea es el control estatal sobre lo que se publica o no en Internet a efectos de paliar la piratería, pero su aplicación práctica permite que cualquiera -con su voto y el de su primo- se te pueda colar en un blog y cerrártelo sin más explicaciones bajo excusas tan peregrinas como que el tipo de letra Times New Roman le pertenece a Julio Cesar. Por supuesto, no paran de repetirnos que eso sólo afectará a los piratas y delincuentes, pero, la verdad, a mi me suena a cuento, como en su momento las supuestas armas de destrucción masiva que justificaron la invasión y robo de petroleo liberación y democratización de Irak en su momento. ¿Y a qué nos recuerda en España? A la infame ley Sinde, por supuesto. En un país donde la justicia tarda en media un par de años en contestar (a favor del gobierno, por supuesto) casos tan flagrantes como la vergonzosa huelga masiva de controladores del puente de diciembre del 2010, parece ser que darle finiquito al blog de un pobre hijo de vecino se puede hacer sobre la marcha bajo el supuesto de que igual en un par de añitos deciden que es un delincuente. Y, digo yo, bajo el supuesto de que hay corrupción a sacos en el gobierno -sea del partido que sea-, ¿no podríamos también preventivamente cortarles el acceso a sus cuentas bancarias, colarnos en sus casas a ver si las cortinas han pasado de ser de IKEA a Dolce Gabana o incautarles el Mercedes por si acaso al final resulta que nos están robando? Ah, no, eso es un caso completamente distinto, porque, al parecer, según nuestro flamante ministro de ¿cultura?,  el que ofrece pirateo es equivalente a un narcotraficante y los que potencialmente se benefician de ello, a drogadictos tirados. Y es que hay que saber cuando morderse la lengua, señores, por no publicar metáforas tan desacertadas como que los políticos españoles (y, al igual que ellos, omito el "algunos") son como las p*tas, ya que cobran por j*der al pueblo. Desacertadas porque al menos ellas intentan dejar al cliente satisfecho, con lo que me parece una profesión mucho más respetable.

Y es que, señores, al poco de su investidura, nuestro nuevo presidente no sólo se pasó por el forro sus afirmaciones de que no subiría los impuestos (completamente imposible de creer, por otra parte, pero que alguien con más cabeza -u honestidad- habría rematado con un "si es que los números que nos pasa el gobierto saliente -presentados ante notario- son ciertos"), sino que aprovechando la resaca navideña, por las escuadra y con alevosía, nos ha colado la ley Sinde por toda la cara. Y es que es muy bonito abstenerse de apoyar una ley impopular cuando todavía tienen que votarnos los "drogadictos" esos que se bajan las cosas de Internet, pero una vez tenemos la sartén por el mango, bajada de pantalones. De acuerdo a las malas lenguas frente a las presiones norteamericanas como ocurrió, fijese usted, con la guerra de Iraq. El resultado: en USA el apagón de ayer de Internet ha hecho que muchos políticos se posicionen en contra de SOPA y, como poco, la ha retrasado un tiempo, mientras que aquí ya tenemos ley Sinde .. para rato. Eso si, parece que al final lo del canon era ilegal. Y me pregunto yo, ¿devolverá la SGAE el dinero recaudado ilegalmente cuando me compraba discos duros para el curro o DVDs para guardar copias de mi tesis?. Sería la primera vez en este país que alguien devolviera algo, me temo.

Y, por aportar algo positivo, sugerirle al gobierno que en vez de luchar contra la piratería mediante censura, igual les luciría más el pelo controlando los ABUSIVOS precios de cine, libros, discos, películas y videojuegos en España, donde teniendo de los salarios más bajos de Europa pagamos la cultura a los precios más elevados. Yo no necesito bajarme juegos de XBox de Internet, me los compro de Amazon UK a una quinta parte de su precio en España y me los dejan en el buzón sin gastos de envío ...

I think that the overwhelming amount of information that all of us have available these days sometimes makes us skip over situations what should have us holding our breath. I'm not saying we are not aware of international news, only we give then just a glimpse of attention and move to other issues. Take, for example, victims in suicidal terrorist attacks in Irak. In the end, we get used to them and they become numbers. Today we are waiting for the earthquake 8 Richter replica that hit Japan a few days ago and hoping for the best, because we are not sure Japan can take it anymore. I'm compiling data and videos today.

Even though Japan is probably the most organized country I've ever been to, we can see it in numbers. The Japan earthquake was a 9 Richter one: the Richter scale is a base-10 logarithmic one, meaning that each point is 10 times higher than the previous one in terms of shaking amplitude.Earthquakes between 9-10 devastate several thousand miles across. A 10.0+ has never been recorded and would probably provoke planetwide devastation. This quake is the sixth largest of all time and the worst to hit Japan.

Fortunately, Japan is well prepared against earthquakes and buildings hold quite well. They do that by swinging with the waves rather than trying to resist them. During the last one, they moved like bamboo in a storm.



The worst was yet to come, though. Ships, trains, buildings and cars were swept away as monster 33ft waves smashed into the port city of Sendai. A boat carrying 80 dock workers was swept away in the 500mph tidal wave while a cruise ship with 100 passengers is also thought to be missing. Officials have lost contact with four trains which are feared to have been engulfed by the tsunami along the coastline. They include two of the famous bullet trains, one of them with 400 passengers. Bridges were swept away and a packed hotel in the city collapsed. While these waves were far from the highest tsunami ever (1720 feet tall in Lituya Bay, Alaska), they penetrated far into the land (up to 5km) and reached as high as 7.3 meters spots.



And, if this was not enough, Japan depends on nuclear power, and Fukushima is close to meltdown. There have been explosions in the nuclear plant and most people think it is a goner. Reactor 1 has no refrigeration and there has already been some partial fusion. Reactors 2, 5 and 6 are also on catastrophic temperature levels. The International Atomic Agency said radioactive material is leaking 'directly' into the air from the stricken plant at a rate of 400 millisieverts per hour. Anyone exposed to over 100 millisieverts a year risks cancer. Population in a 30 km area haa been evacuated. Authorities advise not to go out of home these days.

People are referring to Chernobyl in comparison, at it was equivalent to 10 Hiroshima detonations. A single one wiped out the city in 1945 (over 100000 dead).



As direct results, Japan has shifted 13 feet to the east (4 meters). At the moment, there are already 3373 dead and 7588 missing persons (in the 11S terrorist attack there were 2973 dead and 24 missing persons). There are continuous power shortages on the country and people are massively storing food and fuel. Noone is really sure about the radiation propagation, even though the government states it is safe at the moment. Anyway, radiation in Tokyo is 10 times higher than usual. Nikkei index has sunk and there have been several government rescues to refloat it. There are still 2 tsunami alerts and 14 replica alerts on.

This was a report status from a few days ago:
Status summary:

(1) Tokyo is OK. Transportation is disrupted but recovering.

(2) Entire coastal zone of Fukushima, Miyagi, Iwate, and a part of Ibaraki are basically eliminated. Coastal zone means about 2-3 Km within the original shoreline.
Some places damage extend 10km inward. Tsunami was about 10m high. Geography seems to have changed. In many places, coastal zone ground subsided and underwater.

Center of Sendai seems OK, although there are a few fire and damages. Most serious damages are cities in coastal zone.

All infrastructure is down. No transportation, no electricity, no water.

(3) Self-defense forces are all mobilized. US Navy battle group is heading to the region. this includes USS Ronald Reagan, also US Marine Corp's amphibious assault vehicle, etc. USAID will be deployed as well.

(4) Radiation leakage in FUKUSHIMA #1 power plants. and cooling system is also lost now for Fukushima #2. Leakage is at low level. Self-defense ground force (ARMY) special unit for nuclear incidents arrived on-site to take measures. The most recent report indicate Core Melt Down starting in #1 plant.

(5) A new earthquake in Nagano-Niigata area in early morning hours. Almost a same scale as CHUUETSU earth quake. land slide and damages has been confirmed.

(6) There will be power shortage in Tokyo later today. Electric supply is 10-20% short of demands now as many power plants are down now and will not recover anytime soon.
There will be Rolling Blackout throughout east Japan including Tokyo.

(7) Death toll will raise up as situation unfolds. some cities are simply gone. those numbers are not counted yet.

(8) Despite these, things are in order in affected regions. People helping each other and supply of food and water have already started. While people are worried and shocked, there is no report of riot, chaos, or any unrest. We do not expect unrest or any disorder to take place.

(9) the fault line extending over 600Km have collapsed. M8.9 that is 5th largest in the recorded history of mankind. Plates moved about 4m horizontally and 70cm vertically by GPs based estimate. because of this, there are a series of earth quake in Nagano-niigata area to compensate for plate pressure change. At this moment, most of aftershock is taking place Niigata-nagano area, rather than the original epicenter.

regards,

****


Anyone who wants to help can probably find how to channel their support at their local bank or through reliable institutions. Finally, here is a request from a japanese girl living abroad that you might find easy to grant.

Imagen tomada del magnífico blog de Raul Salazar Un respeto a las canas. ¡No os lo perdais!

Two weeks ago, I bought 5 Xbox games (NEW) from Amazon UK. 3 of them are already here. All in all, I paid for the whole 5 (post costs included) what I would have paid for 1 game and a half in Spain. I usually buy 2 to 5 books every couple of months from Book Depository (no post costs). I usually pay half of what I would have paid here. Just an example: any Discworld novel (TP) is around 7 EUR. Just ask in your bookstore for the same. And don't get me started with hard cover books! I used to go to the movies twice a week when I was studying at the university. I watched everything I found remotely interesting then. Of course, now the ticket is around 7 EUR (more if you go IMAX), so I only go to see flicks I'm really interested into, that have lots of FX and just if I'm going with friends. I also used to buy a couple of CDs each month, and they were around 6-8 EUR in Madrid (NEW). A few years later they magically became 20-24 EUR each. Needless to say, I don't do that anymore. I do buy music at concerts or from people playing in the streets, though. And, guess what? they are still 6-8 EUR from them.

Now, on the other side, I work as an engineer, i.e. I have to use electronic equipment, PCs, etc on a daily basis. Each time I use an USB, HDD, CD, DVD, etc, I'm paying a tax to the so-called society of "creators" just to do my job. Even printers have this tax and I'm sure they are not charging paper just because they still can't. Why? Because I COULD BE using that stuff to store multimedia copyrighted content. Not because I HAVE, but because I COULD BE. I don't know if you people know about the base of our law system: presumption of innocence. Well, the SS (Sinde and SGAE) are assuming just the contrary, that everybody is guilty unless proven so. Not only they charge us for this, but they also think they are morally so above us that they feel they can insult every person using the Internet (Internauts as a whole) by calling us thieves. I've got some serious concerns about this. First, why are we thieves if we are paying in advance for anything we are (or are not) downloading? Not to mention that we have probably the most expensive Internet service in the whole world (thanks, Internet providers, speaking of thieves ...). Second, why does this tax go to spanish "creators" (most of them haven't created anything for years, just take the SGAE president, for example) if it is a proven fact that most downloaded material is american or english? And what is a spanish creator? Someone who speaks spanish? Because some very loud "creators" don't even pay taxes in Spain -like Alejandro Sanz-.
In fact, why pay for spanish movies twice, if most of the costs of producing it are taken from our taxes? A few exceptions aside, I DON'T like spanish movies, so can I just NOT pay for them to be produced? Third, why has a person with clear and proven ties to SGAE been chosen for the ministry of culture? There is a thing called incompatibility in laws that easily leads to corruption (prevaricación, para los hispano-parlantes). In fact, what do we know about culture since Sinde is head of the ministry except for SGAE and illegal downloads? Is there no culture in Spain at all except that?

My guess is that the current government owed it big to SGAE for support in the elections and gave them whatever they wanted, even a ministry to one of their members so they can do what they want. Do you know, for example, that if the tax they impose on electronical equipment and such is not over a threshold they have freedom to get the rest of the money from somewhere else? And if any of you is thinking, "ok, I don't use electronic equipment", don't forget that each time you have a drink at a coffee shop or a pub, or you listen to a tune at the dentist waiting room or whatever, you are indirectly paying, because those people have to pay the tax and they will charge YOU their costs. They charge everything, from music in funerals to charity concerts. They have gone as far as to sneak into weddings and other ceremonies to check if they were playing music.

I simply do not want to know what they may have promised to the different political factions in the country to make the Sinde law succeed (we will also pay for that, mind you). It takes a socialist government to remove a basic freedom (like writing in your web whatever you want) and not only get away with it, but also laugh at and criminalize anyone opposing you.

Guess what? I'll keep buying my stuff from other countries via the Internet and let these "creators" work for their food. Too bad the government -and specially the SGAE government- will take from my taxes anything they need to pay these guys whatever they estimate they deserve. In the movies, when a group of guys walked from one shop to the next asking money for "protection", they called it mafia. In Spain, we call it SGAE.

After re-reading the title, most of you could probably be waiting for something else, but, nope, this is exactly about games. Board games I played this weekend until we couldn't stand awake anymore (that's 6am to you, buddies) while the guys who could not join the board played Left for Dead 2 in team (we managed to end it in a run and everthing :D)

NOTE: We are NOT the people in the videos. Not that we are not freaky enough to tape it, only we did not think of it soon enough ;P



The first one was one of my faves: Galactica. It is obviously based on the TV series, shortly after the pilot, and you can start playing as one of the main characters or as a cylon in disguise. There are many tests you have to deal with, like lack of food, cylon attacks, low moral ... and everyone has to contribute to the trial with cards from their hands; only cylons in disguise may contribute negatively, mind you. For the first time, I got to be the skinjob and did pretty well my job :D In the end, I got all humans in prison or infirmary before revealing myself and Galactica surrounded by ships and crowding with centurions. After I burst the presidential ship, their moral went down to the sink and we won. It's good to be bad! The best part was that I based my whole strategy on the other's paranoia, just like in the series :D



A second game was Pandemia. In this case, it is a collaborative game, were players conform a team including doctors, scientists, engineers and managers that have to fight four different plagues before they outbreak in the unsuspecting world. This game is strange. Initially, it seems quite complex. After five minutes, you realize it is easy. And only after you've lost like 5 times you realize that it is indeed complex, but not because of the game rules, just because it is really easy to lose even when you think you've got everything under control. A really nice game and it's got an advantage: you won't end in a hand to hand combat with all the other players :D



The final choice was Last Night on Earth, a survival zombie game where part of the players play the zombies and the rest need to end one out of five missions in the game. The zombies just want dinner, but they get 4 nifty cards they can use against you, like "lights out", "oh, the horror", "I just forgot the keys in..." and such. Humans are faster, but they only get one card per location (not turn) and if they don't get a weapon, they might as well be wearing sauce. Oh, and if you get infested ... you'll become a very fast zombie in the next turn. Gross! In this case, I was very happy running around the board with the bad guys on my track until I arrived to a location with a male human player and the zombies used their "Last night on Earth" card on me. Go figure. I lost my last three turns and they won. No hard feelings, I had just blasted a few hundreds of them before in the XBox :)

No soy muy amiga de los mails en cadena, pero estoy totalmente de acuerdo con este que me acaba de llegar y, como soy más de blogs que de mails ...
Sentíos libres cada uno de distibuirlo a vuestra conveniencia.

ES JUSTO QUE SE SEPA


Me llega este escrito y me 'invitan' a que NO LO PARE.
NO LO HARE ya que, casi todo lo que dice, es para tenerlo en cuenta.

EL GOBIERNO: Ha bajado el sueldo a los funcionarios, suprimido el cheque-bebé, congelado las pensiones y reducido la ayuda al desempleo, (PARO), para afrontar la crisis que han generado los bancos los políticos y los especuladores bursátiles.

Nos gustaría transmitirle al Gobierno lo siguiente:

Dediquen su empeño en rebajar LA VERGÜENZA DEL FRAUDE FISCAL, que en España se sitúa alrededor del 23% del P.I.B. (10 puntos por encima de la media europea) y por el que se pierden miles de millones de Euros, fraude que repercute en mayores impuestos para los ciudadanos honestos.

TENGAN LA VERGÜENZA de hacer un plan para que la Banca devuelva al erario público los miles de millones de euros que Vds. les han dado para aumentar los beneficios de sus accionistas y directivos, en vez de, facilitar el crédito a las familias y a las empresas, erradicar las comisiones por los servicios bancarios y que dejen de cobrar a los españoles más humildes, el 30.01, cada vez que su menguada cuenta se queda sin saldo. Cosa que ocurre cada 1º de mes, cuando les cargan las facturas de colegios, comunidades, telefonía, etc, cuando aun, no les han abonado la nómina.

PONGAN COTO a los desmanes de las empresas de telefonía y de ADSL que ofrecen los servicios más caros de Europa y de peor calidad.

ELIMINEN la duplicidad de muchas Administraciones Públicas, suprimiendo organismos innecesarios, reasignado a los funcionarios de carrera y acabando con los cargos, asesores de confianza y otros puestos nombrados a dedo que, pese a ser innecesarios en su mayor parte, son los que cobran los sueldazos en las Administraciones Públicas y su teórica función puede ser desempeñada de forma más cualificada por muchos funcionarios públicos titulados y que lamentablemente están infrautilizados.

HAGAN que los políticos corruptos de sus partidos devuelvan el dinero equivalente a los perjuicios que han causado al erario público con su mala gestión o/y sus fechorías, y endurezcan el Código Penal con procedimientos judiciales más rápidos y con castigos ejemplares para ellos.

DIJO la Vicepresidente del gobierno "que es indecente que mientras la inflación es -1% y, tengamos más de 4.000.000 de parados, haya gente que no esté de acuerdo en alargar la jubilación a los 70 años".

Nos gustaría transmitirle a esta "Sra. Vicepresidente" y a todos los políticos, lo que consideramos indecente :

INDECENTE, es que el salario mínimo de un trabajador sea de 624 mes y el de un diputado de 3.996, pudiendo llegar, con dietas y otras prebendas, a 6.500 mes. Y bastantes más por diferentes motivos que se le pueden agregar.

INDECENTE, es que un profesor, un maestro, un catedrático de universidad o un cirujano de la sanidad pública, ganen menos que el concejal de festejos de un ayuntamiento de tercera.

INDECENTE, es que los políticos se suban sus retribuciones en el porcentaje que les apetezca (siempre por unanimidad, por supuesto, y al inicio de la legislatura).

INDECENTE, es que un ciudadano tenga que cotizar 35 años para percibir una jubilación y a los diputados les baste sólo con siete, y que los miembros del gobierno, para cobrar la pensión máxima, sólo necesiten jurar el cargo.

INDECENTE, es que los diputados sean los únicos trabajadores (¿?) de este país que están exentos de tributar un tercio de su sueldo del IRPF.

INDECENTE, es colocar en la administración a miles de asesores, (léase amigotes), con sueldos que ya desearían los técnicos más cualificados.

INDECENTE, es el ingente dinero destinado a sostener a los partidos y sindicatos pesebreros, aprobados por los mismos políticos que viven de ellos.

INDECENTE, es que a un político no se le exija superar una mínima prueba de capacidad para ejercer su cargo (ni cultural ni intelectual).

INDECENTE, es el coste que representa para los ciudadanos sus comidas, coches oficiales, chóferes, viajes (siempre en gran clase) y tarjetas de crédito por doquier.

INDECENTE No es que no se congelen el sueldo sus señorías, sino que no se lo bajen.

INDECENTE, es que sus señorías tengan seis meses de vacaciones al año.

INDECENTE, es que ministros, secretarios de estado y altos cargos de la política, cuando cesan, son los únicos ciudadanos de este país que pueden legalmente percibir dos salarios del ERARIO PÚBLICO.

Y que sea cuál sea el color del gobierno, toooooooodos los políticos se benefician de este moderno "derecho de pernada" mientras no se cambien las leyes que lo regula.

¿Y quiénes las cambiarán? ¿Ellos mismos? Ja.

Juntemos firmas para que haya un proyecto de ley con "cara y ojos" para acabar con estos privilegios, y con otros.

Haz que esto llegue al Congreso a través de tus amigos
ÉSTA SÍ DEBERÍA SER UNA DE ESAS CADENAS QUE NO SE DEBE ROMPER, PORQUE SÓLO NOSOTROS PODEMOS PONERLE REMEDIO A ESTO,
Y ÉSTA, SI QUE TRAERÁ AÑOS DE MALA SUERTE SI NO PONEMOS REMEDIO, está en juego nuestro futuro y el de nuestros hijos.

(Y para que este mail no se convierta en un spam, por favor, borra la dirección de quien te lo envió y escribe las direcciones de las personas a las que se los envíes en CCO.)

DONDE ESTAN LOS ESPAÑOLES?
QUE LEVANTAN MASAS PARA EL FUTBOL
Y NO PARA DEFENDER NUESTROS DERECHOS.

After so many flames and wrath, I had to be nice for a while (or a post, at least), so I decided to find something I like. The Key of Awesome it is. These guys have a weekly musical web show where they do parodies on most top chart pop starts and whatever they fancy (which is usually equally hilarious, anyway). Just watch their video "I'll never be an emo vampire" and you'll get what I mean :D
And they are not only funny in video, the songs are really hilarious (they even include the lyrics for us, not native-speakers!). They started with a neat flick on people obsessed with kittens on the web (c'mon, we all have a friend like that) sung by ... Metallica!! They've got really catchy songs, but the one that has been bumping over my head during the last week has been Telephone, with Lady Gaga and Beyonce.



I had not seen the original video yet, but I did not really need to :D:D:D Now that I've seen it, I can say that this one is positively better and makes more sense :P

But, hey, no hard feelings. Everybody knows you don't f**k with the Gaga!



BTW, their last video is on Michael Jackson watching Glee. Enough, I say :D

(You'll have to forgive me with this one, guys, but some things are better said in spanish :P)

¿Alguno es tan viejo como para acordarse de como era Shakira al principio de los tiempos? Pues voy a refrescaros la memoria. Esta es la Shakira que yo escuchaba y disfrutaba:



Y esta es la que le pidio consejos estilisticos a Madonna para hacer un video (no se tiene que estar riendo nada, la Madonna, que seguro que penso que despues de esto ya nunca perderia el puesto de reinona del pop)


¿Alguien es capaz de encontrar las 5 diferencias? Mmmm, pues si, en la primera lleva las manos sucias, en la segunda lleva una pulsera en el tobillo ... y algo mas debe haber, pero ahora no caigo. La que si parece que ha caido es ella del tercer piso, porque la postura debe ser dolorosisima. Yo creo que, en algun momento, le ha debido de morder el espiritu de Lady Gaga en luna llena y ya no hay nada que hacer por la pobre chica.

Despues de sufrir en silencio (como las hemorroides) los cada vez mas horripilantes cambios no solo en el estilismo, sino en el tono y letra de sus canciones y, sobre todo, en la cantidad de ropa que (no) lleva encima, el video de la loba esa me decidió a poner punto y final a la relacion musical que mantenia con esta mujer desde sus primeros discos (y algun que otro concierto), porque esto es ya mas triste que ver a Bob Dylan tomar clases de estilismo de Tamara y Paco Clavel. Y no es solo la apariencia, que va. Porque, ¿y las letras?. Esto es de mi cancion favorita, Inevitable. Cantautora, con un estilo original, buena voz ...

Siempre supe que es mejor
Cuando hay que hablar de dos
Empezar por uno mismo
Ya sabras la situacion
Aqui todo esta peor
Pero al menos aun respiro
No tienes que decirlo
No vas a volver
Te conozco bien
Ya buscare que hacer contigo
El cielo esta cansado ya de ver
La lluvia caer
Y cada dia que pasa es uno mas
Parecido a ayer
No encuentro forma alguna de
Olvidarte porque
Seguir amandote es inevitable

Y esta "perla" (buscada en Internet, que lo que habla no hay quien lo entienda) del ultimo single Loca (loca hay que estar para ir cuesta abajo y sin frenos despues de una carrera musical tan prometedora, eso si es verdad)

That girl is a naughta
I heat up when I touch her
Chica caliente
Got me rapping to merengue
I feel so el presidente
I’m runnin’ shit and I’m lovin’ it
She’s got a mean lil’ butt,
But you should see what she does with it
She keeps it down low (down low, down low)
I can never get enough (oh no, oh no)

No es ya el estilo pendon verbenero-mujer objeto-guarrona al que ultimamente ya nos tiene acostumbrados a los sufridos fans, sino la remezcla de todos los topicazos latinos que se le pasan por la cabeza al letrista de turno (por favor, que alguien me diga que no es ella!!), mas aquello de que la mitad no hay quien lo entienda. Vamos, que por no entender, no se entiende ni en que lenguaje habla. ¿Que es eso del sofa burgues? Y mejor ni nos reimos del asesinato que perpetra al ingles. Para eso ya estan los americanos (!). Los ingleses simplemente habran decidido que el Dr Who la elimine de su realidad.

A mi solo se me ocurre echarle la culpa de todo ... a ¡Emilio Estefan! ¡Bien que a su mujer la quitó de la farándula y de las Miami Sound Machine (que vienen a ser como 3 Shakiras como la de ahora, igual las ha clonado o algo) y la puso a cantar merengue y son cubano, bien tapadica hasta las rodillas! ¡Malditooo! ¡Asi se te atasque en la tele el video de la loba y no puedas ver Bob Esponja!

Por lo menos, siempre hay alguien contento, claro. Debe ser la primera vez que alguien cambia para parecerse a Paulina Rubio y no al reves :P

Este post va dedicado a la Aplicadilla, otra victima como yo del malvado Estefan y su Miami Cash Machine

Don't you sometimes have experiences that you'd rather have not and chastisize yourself to never, ever fall into the same mistake again? Sure you do. But, then, is it possible that after years pass you can't recall exactly what was so bad about them and fall into the same trap? That is exactly my case. For example, each time I go hiking to the mountains and sleep outdoors after a whole day climbing. Or whenever I find out (with horror) that the movie I'm actually watching is directed by Michael Bay(!).

And it was definitely the case with Interview with a vampire. I'm sorry for the fans, but the book bored me to death, I did not like any of the characters and I just finished it because I have this compulsion not to leave a book until the last page even if I don't like it. Well, ten years later, I found The Witching Hour and someone had told me it was a great book, so I go and start reading it. Boohooo! Anne Rice just like I suddenly remembered her: long, boring descriptions, snail-slow pace that makes you forget about any interest you could have in the story after a while and, certainly, devious sex scenes ranging from incest to whatever comes to (her) mind. And, worst of all, completely open final that forces you to go and buy another brick of a book to learn what the heck happens to the characters (not that you care for any of them at a personal level, mind you, but if you are curious...). And where is the key to understand the whole book? (the lasher) In the next volume, of course.

I should start tatooing the authors I hate in my body as in Memento, in case I find myself reading another Da Vinci code in a few years ...

When one does not have much time for PS2 or XBox, there's always NDS to fool around and, in this case, I just finished Bleach: the Third Phantom. Amazingly, they did not fall in the classic fight game trap, where each title is basically the same the previous was, except with (maybe) more playable characters, different backgrounds and new combos. In this case, they went for a "Valkirie profile" kind of game, where you get a story and strategy. And the story (by Kubo) is even linked to the main stream! In fact, I found it more appealing than the current episodes, which have fallen in the usual "get your ass kicked-train to get more power-beat the enemy to pulp-find someone more powerful" routine that every fight anime seems to eventually fall into at some point. At least, characters do interact (some of them, quite a lot, mind you :P) We get a lot of secondary characters (and not only the most popular ones according to who-knows-what poll in Japan) And you still have time to beat up Arrancar, Espada and whatnots. I did play as the girl, BTW.


Now, if only I could get the time to finish Fall Out 3! It's hard to be the local paladin, side-missions never seem to stop :P

Yep, I know I've been pretty quiet here lately, but time is scarce, so let's go to the point: what I've been reading lately. In most cases, borrowed books, but I met Book Depository and it has been love at first sight :D



Fear Nothing (Dean Koontz)
Christopher Snow is extremely sun-sensitive, so he lives in the night. And, yet, somehow, he is a surfer in California, mind you. And super-cool, like every Koont's main character (note ironic tone here). And he seems to be the only person in town who realizes everyone is acting weird and there are strange creatures on the loose (if you've read ANY other book by the author, no real surprise here). I don't know why I read this. I do not like Koontz's books. They are boring. They are slow. And their ending is completely off-the-hook. It seems at first we are getting somewhere, but eventually, everything is caused by some government experiment and grows to epic proportions, totally out of the hands of the characters that simply decide to go on with their lives. I just read this books every bunch of years, when I forget what a total disappointment was the previous one, just like Roland Emmerich's films (well, in this case, it is usually because I forget to check the movie director before I watch the film and then I curse myself again and again along the very looooong movie...)


Pride, perjudice and zombies (Seth Grahame-Smith)
This was a gift from my brother in law, and, hey, it's fun. Basically, there is not much difference with respect to Austen's original work, except for some beheading and kung-fu. I was not expecting much of the book and that's what I got, but I enjoyed a good laugth here and there and freshened my Austen. Only I ended with this longing to find a husband for every single friend ...


The Chinatown Death Cloud Peril (Paul Malmont)
Maybe I was expecting too much of this novel, but it turned out to be too boring to be an action pulp and too pulp to be anything else. In 1937, Walter Gibson, the mind behind The Shadow, and his rival Lester Dent, creator of Doc Savage team up to solve H. P. Lovecraft's murder. And there are chinese foes involved, surely. I just could not get interested in the plot, even though it had every element for me to love it.


Truckers (Terry Pratchett)
I might be on a low streak, because I did not get interested in this one either. Unlike the Discworld series, that usually put a smile in my face in every page, Truckers is too dark to really be funny. It focus on the troubles of a tribe of nomes who have always lived inside a mall when outers arrive there just in time to discover that the mall is about to be demolished. The novel point on this is that gnomes live shorter lives, so generations come and go in barely a century and their society reflects that. It is not bad, but not up to Discworld standards.



Private Wars (Greg Rucka)
I hit the jackpot with this one! I like Rucka in general, and Queen and Country usually makes my day (unless I'm kind of low, in that case, I avoid it at all costs). Tara Chace is a british spy (in a very realistic tone) who has just lost a lover and given birth to a daughter, yet she can not really leave the thrill of a job she both loves and hates. She is offered a mission in diplomatically crucial Uzbekistan. President Malikov is ailing, and a succession fight between his son, Ruslam, and evil daughter, Sevara, has begun. Tara is asked to get Ruslam and his son out of the country, but, as usual, the plan does not go as expected and she is just in the middle when all hell breaks loose.


Ender's game (Orson Scott Card)
Yep, better late than never. I finally read this book and it was ok. Not amazing, not bad, just okay. Great expectations, once more, I guess. I think it is too long. It could have been solved as a short story (originally, I've been told it was just that) and it would not have been a great loss. Still, it was good enough to read the second book in a future. Got it from Amazon some months ago, too. Gifted kid born in a military society in perpetual war against an insectoid race. He is sent to military academy before the usual age (he has been conceived for that reason, too) and has to face jealous students, hard training and tough decisions before he even has facial hair. Plus there are some surprises at the end of the story.

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I'm leaving something out, most likely, but who cares :) And I've just received my copy of Baltimore, from Mignola and Golden. Book Depository, if I ever get my copy of A game of Thrones in time, this is forever :D!

Since I don't have much time to write lately, I've decided to gather here some old, long lost posts that could still be of use. Of course, this one was written before the Twilight thing that seems to be the Beverly Hills, 90210 of the decade, only with (some) blood and pretty, pretty boys ...

"When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the Earth"

So vampires are out! We had our deal of vampire projects both in films (Blade, Underworld, Dracula ...) and comics (20 days of night, I am legend ...) some time ago, but zombies seems to be in now.



Zombies were traditionally soulless bodies meant to obey a sorcerer as slaves, both in chinese and voodoo folklore. However, their rol in horror mostly started in 1968 with Romero's Night of the living dead", where they served no master, but an insatiable hunger for living flesh. Zombie basics were stated here: i) they are awaken by some virus or experiment; ii) they can only be killed by destroying their brains; iii) they are driven by hunger; and iv) if you're bitten, you are a goner. Zombies are dumb and slow, and their strength lies in their number and also in the fact that they are virtually unstoppable unless beheaded. Plus maybe you knew some of them in life ...

"Dawn of the dead" and "Day of the Dead" soon followed and then, for a while, almost everyone did a gore zombie flick. Some people stuck loyally to zombies even in the 90s. For example, Peter "LotR" Jackson did Braindead in 1992 and Raimi's Ash trilogy. I personally enjoyed Tom Savini's "Night of the Living Dead" 1990 remake, with Pat Tallman as a Barbara definitely more lethal than the poor undead. However, the zombies revival would not come until the last years and it was probably another remake, "Dawn of the Dead", that brought them back. The novelty of the film: now zombies ran like hell!
Obviously, the Resident Evil games and films helped as well. RE1 was very cool -as any Paul Anderson film- and had an intelligent plot that absorbed my attention all the way to the end. RE2, however, seemed boring to me and the characters, even Alice, were flat. RE3 was not up to it, either.



I also have a thing for The Undead, but, be warned, you really need a sense of humour to watch this one!
We also had the horrible -in a bad sense- "House of the Dead" and the somewhat different, "Shaun of the Dead". But let's talk comics now.



I guess the current run started with Dark Horse "Zombie World", by Mignola and McEown. Mignola was already well into Hellboy and he wrote the first limited series of this short lived project. An evil ancient priest came back from the dead and tricked humans into blasting him to pieces, despite the efforts of the main characters, a group of paranormal investigators. Of course, his "death" brings the dead back to life and he becomes their king. These series were released prior to the new zombie fever and only lasted for 3 limited series and a few specials.


IDW released Niles and Dwyer's Remains, a very well drawn series with a somewhat simple script. Some brain decides to destroy all nuclear weapons by putting them all together in a so called "nuclear oven" and burning them in a public exhibition, only there's free access to jackasses and a red button with a bright sign "Do not touch me". Obviously, there's an accident and the resulting blast turns everyone around into zombies. The main characters, however, were locked inside a vault in Reno -don't ask- and save their lives only to find themselves surrounded by thousand of hungry zombies. Hungry evoluting zombies.



Next zombie project is a cool one: Kirkman's "The Walking Dead", a very well told soap opera with zombies. The series start like "28 days". Rick Grimes awakes alone in an empty hospital. While he has been in a coma, the world has gone to hell. Somehow, the dead are now roaming the country and eating everyone and he has to find his family in the reigning havoc. However, the series is not about killing zombies, but about relationships, social dynamics and human interaction in a extreme situation. Not that there's no zombie killing, also :)



And now, things I have not read yet ...

-Barbara's zombie chronicles: Barbara was one of the main characters of Night of the Living Dead and, being the main character in these series, she must have been taken from the remake (she did not end that well in the original film), so expect guns and attitude! The art is not my piece, but maybe the story is ok ...

-Containment: zombies in space! Apparently, something goes VERY wrong with hibernating astronauts in a ship ... Haven't seen anything on this one yet.

-Romero's Toe Tag: A classic. In a nick of time, the undead have taken control of Earth and a few survivors struggle to keep surviving... It's Romero, after all!

Plus there are more projects, included in this zombie comic list.

It's been a while since my last post, basically because I have to work for a living (but not so much, mind ya :D). Thus, just to let you know I'm alive, I found this old text I wrote for the spanish edition of the first Firefly miniseries. Here ya go (no time for translation, sorry :():

Antecedentes

Alrededor del 2057 dC la Tierra dejó de disponer de los recursos necesarios para sustentar a su creciente población. Contrariamente a lo que cabía esperar de la especie, en lugar de exterminarse en una guerra mundial, sus dos grandes superpotencias, China y Estados Unidos, colaboraron en una migración masiva a una estrella cercana, rodeada de planetas y lunas cuyas características los hacían susceptibles de volverse habitables.

Tras un viaje tan largo que una generación completa nunca llegó a ver el exterior de una nave, se terraformaron los primeros planetas, Sihnon y Londinium, bautizados tras Sino, un apodo para la palabra chino, y Londres, que Estados Unidos se había anexionado tiempo atrás. La terraformación lleva décadas hasta obtener planetas con la misma gravedad y atmósfera que la Tierra y durante ese tiempo de colaboración, las culturas china y americana se fundieron, combinándose el inglés y el mandarín en una única lengua estándar. Ambos mundos constituyeron lo que más tarde se conoció como El Núcleo, asociación a la que se unirían los mundos de Osiris y Ariel.



Sin embargo, el viaje espacial no contribuyó a igualar las clases sociales y, ante la creciente ocupación de los planetas más civilizados, los ciudadanos más pobres emigraron a otros más alejados. Es estos mundos, sobrevivieron como pudieron, carentes de la tecnología más avanzada y sujetos a enfermedades endémicas como el mal de Bowden. Pocos años más tarde, aparecerían por la frontera del sistema los seres conocidos como los Reabres. Según los rumores, sus víctimas eran violadas hasta la muerte, devoradas y despellejadas para servir de vestimenta a sus verdugos y, si tenían mucha suerte, en ese orden. Si bien nadie podía confirmar esos rumores, dado que no dejaban supervivientes, la creencia general era que procedían de la degeneración en las fronteras de lo que alguna vez fueron seres humanos.

Algún tiempo después, los planetas del Núcleo se constituyeron en la Alianza. Si bien no pretendía en principio constituir una asociación imperialista, la organización militarista que se encargaba de mantener las disposiciones de ésta tenía claramente otros objetivos. Incluso se constituyeron organizaciones secretas cuya existencia desconocía la mayoría del parlamento y que se rumorea que llevaban a cabo experimentos con especimenes humanos.

Cuando los recursos escasearon en el Núcleo, se decidió que todos los planetas externos debían unirse a la Alianza y someterse a sus leyes. Esta iniciativa encontró una fuerte oposición en algunos mundos exteriores, que se unieron en una guerra civil contra el Núcleo, irónicamente denominada Guerra de la Unificación, pese a que poco podían hacer contra las fuertemente armadas y mucho más avanzadas tropas de éste. La guerra duró años (2506-2511) y mundos enteros se vieron arrasados. La última batalla se libró en el valle de Serenity, en el planeta Hera, donde las fuerzas independientes o Chaquetas Marrones fueron finalmente erradicadas y los mundos se unieron bajo el ya férreo control de la Alianza.

Los personajes

Malcolm Reynolds se unió como voluntario al 57 Regimiento de Infantería de los Independientes –familiarmente conocido como la Brigada “Bolas y Bayonetas”- cuando apenas tenía 20 años, alcanzando el grado de sargento. Su planeta natal, Shadow, fue bombardeado y destruido por la Alianza poco tiempo después y todo lo que le quedó fue la cabo Zoe Alleyne, soldado profesional, letal, eficiente y leal hasta la muerte, con la que participó en muchas de las campañas más sangrientas, como Du-Khang o New Kashmir. También tomaron parte en la última batalla de la guerra, en el valle de Serenity, cuya importancia estratégica lo hacía indispensable a ambos bandos. Pese a comandar inicialmente a poco más de treinta efectivos, la elevada tasa de mortandad entre los mandos lo puso al frente de más de dos mil soldados: un total de 16 brigadas y 20 tanques antiaereos que consiguieron mantener la posición durante casi dos meses. Completamente rodeados, Reynolds mantuvo a duras penas la moral de la tropa en espera del apoyo aéreo de la 82, que nunca llegó. Tras la muerte de casi medio millón de efectivos, Mal conservó apenas 400 hombres, que fueron diezmados por la enfermedad y el hambre cuando ambos bandos olvidaron a sus soldados mientras firmaban la paz. Al llegar los cuerpos médicos, ante el “Gracias a Dios” de Zoe, Mal se limitó a contestar “¿Dios? ¿Qué colores viste?”. Había perdido oficialmente lo que le quedaba de fe.



Reacio a adaptarse a un sistema controlado por la Alianza, Mal compró su propia nave, un transporte 03-K64 Firefly de segunda mano que previamente perteneció a un tal Capitán Harbatkin y cuyo registro nunca llegaría a actualizar. A partir de ese momento, Reynolds la bautizaría como Serenity. Zoe permanecería con él como segunda al mando y tendría gran influencia en la incorporación de Hoban “Wash” Washburne, un excelente piloto que podría haber obtenido un trato mucho mejor en cualquier otro crucero pero que acabaría casándose con ella apenas un año más tarde. Pese al buen talante y al carácter afable de Wash, su matrimonio sería motivo de disputa con el capitán, que no lo consideraba suficiente para Zoe, mientras que el piloto desconfiaba igualmente de la lealtad incondicional de su esposa hacia Reynolds. Este conflicto se saldaría años después durante una aventura conjunta.

Otra adquisición para la tripulación la supuso Jayne Cobbs, mercenario y rastreador, capaz de vender a su madre si el precio es adecuado. Cobbs tendió una trampa a Serenity junto a sus asociados, pero no dudó en cambiar de bando cuando Mal le ofreció mejores condiciones. Cobbs es extremadamente útil pero poco de fiar, si bien en ocasiones ha sorprendido favorablemente a sus compañeros. El último –y más joven- miembro de la tripulación lo constituye Kaylee Frye, un auténtico genio de la mecánica. Procedente de un planeta relativamente atrasado, se cruzó con Reynolds cuando el anterior mecánico de éste, un tal Bester, la invitó a una visita privada a Serenity. Después de que Kaylee solucionara un problema que éste se había confesado incapaz de arreglar durante las últimas semanas, Reynolds lo sustituyó inmediatamente. Kaylee no sólo parecía comunicarse con la nave, sino que resultó ser además la alegría del grupo y la hermana menor que ninguno tenía.



Con esta tripulación, Serenity estaba lista para aceptar cualquier trabajo –legal o ilegal- que mantuviera combustible en los motores y comida sobre la mesa. Sin embargo, la renuencia del capitán a aceptar trabajos inmorales en ocasiones hacía difícil este objetivo, motivo por el cual se optó por alquilar las dos lanzaderas de la nave. Increíblemente, una acompañante registrada se interesó por una de ellas. Las acompañantes eran el equivalente a las geishas japonesas y, como éstas, gozaban de un altísimo estatus social, podían permitirse escoger sus clientes y tenían la exquisita educación de la que no disponía ningún miembro de la tripulación de Serenity. El incluirla en la nave suponía una clara ventaja estratégica, ya que le confería la respetabilidad necesaria para amarar en determinados puertos muy por encima del estatus de la nave. Por qué Inara Serra decidió abandonar la Casa Madre en Sihnon, pese a que podría haber llegado gobernarla en poco tiempo, para viajar en una chatarra espacial por los confines del Núcleo es algo que nadie se ha conseguido explicar. Además, el ejercicio de su profesión, que Mal simplifica a simple prostitución y su apoyo a la Alianza durante la Guerra, unido a la obvia atracción entre ambos supuso una fuente de conflictos lo suficientemente importante como para que Reynolds decidiese no alquilar la otra lanzadera.

La serie

Tras un negocio fallido, como la mayoría de los de Reynolds, éste decidió probar suerte con su carga en una luna lejana y, para amortizar el desplazamiento, llevar pasajeros de pago. Entre éstos se encontaba el pastor Derrial Book, aparentemente más interesado por el viaje que por el destino, un tal Lawrence Dobson y Simon Tam, un joven doctor de aspecto adinerado que parecía huir de algo y se interesaba –en opinión de Mal- en exceso por la nave y sus tripulantes. Consciente de que su nave resultaba menos que atractiva para individuos de semejante clase social, Malcolm decidió mantener un ojo en Simon. Así, cuando detectó que una nave de la Alianza le pisaba los talones, asumió la culpabilidad de Tam y, tras derribarlo, abrió el enorme baúl que transportaba, descubriendo criogenizada a una chica adolescente. Esta resultó ser su hermana River, una joven superdotada que una agencia secreta gubernamental había secuestrado y que Simon acababa de recuperar en contra de la voluntad de su familia, convirtiéndose, a todo efecto, en un fugitivo. Dobson se descubrió inmediatamente como el topo de la Alianza, pero no iba tras Serenity, sino tras los Tam. Mal podría haberlo entregado para mantener a salvo a los suyos, pero Dobson perdió los nervios e, involuntariamente, hirió a Kaylee en lo que resultó ser un movimiento terriblemente estúpido. Tras reducir a Dobson, que eventualmente acabaría abandonado en Whitefalls con un disparo en la cabeza, Mal ordenó a Simon que salve la vida a su mecánico, pero éste se negó salvo que lo ayudaran a escapar de la nave de la Alianza a su espalda. Mal cedió, pero le garantizó que si la chica moría, ambos hermanos acabarán reuniéndose con ella. En realidad, Mal simpatiza con las causas perdidas y acabó ofreciéndole a Simon el puesto de médico de a bordo muy a pesar de Jayne, que está dispuesto a entregarlos a la menor ocasión. Kaylee, sin embargo, vió una oportunidad en el doctor, que sin embargo parecía ajeno a sus intentos de seducción.

Aparentemente, River Tam había perdido la cabeza y actuaba de forma errática y, en ocasiones, peligrosa. Con el tiempo, resultó evidente que había sido sometida a neurocirugía una y otra vez para potenciar sus capacidades innatas. Como resultado, no dispone de los filtros naturales para aislar pensamientos y emociones, ya sean suyos … o no. Bajo estas circunstancias, resultaba obvio su valor para la Alianza y el por qué eventualmente alguien acabaría dando con ellos, motivo por el cual Malcolm optó por desviarse de las rutas más habituales. Esto situó a Inara en una posición incómoda, más aún en tanto que sus sentimientos por el capitán estaban comenzando a interferir seriamente con su trabajo. De forma similar, el pastor Book, que había decidido permanecer en la nave para hacer lo posible por la integridad moral de la tripulación, descubrió que, más bien al contrario, Malcolm lo estaba conduciendo a comportarse de forma violenta, lo que le recuerda a un pasado que intentó dejar atrás. Un pasado en el que tuvo en la Alianza un puesto lo suficientemente relevante como para desviar de sus deberes a un crucero de guerra.
Ahora, tras un último trabajo fallido, las reservas económicas de la tripulación están en las últimas, la Alianza sigue de cerca de Serenity e Inara ha decidido marcharse. Parece que nada puede irle peor al capitán Reynolds …

Well, I haven't written much lately, basically because I haven't done much lately beside working and, at some point of the day, watching TV or, rather, DVDs, as there is not much on TV to watch. So, today I just decided to go through some anime I've been on these days. Did you ever start to watch this japanese cartoon show and think, "this is quite a kiddie thing" just to, after a few episodes, thank God you never got your nieces to actually watch it? This is anime for you, guys!



First, there is Bleach. The underlying concept is pretty ordinary; you get these gods of death, or shinigami, basically in charge of collecting the souls of dead people just after their demise. If they don't, these souls may become what they call hollows, the bad guys from the show. They carry these really large swords they can modify with their inner force and most of them can use martial arts and even magic -kido- at some extent. The show starts when Ichigo, the main character, helps this shinigami Rukia girl defeat some hollows by borrowing her sword and, with it, most her powers. Now he is stuck with her job and hollows seems to be everywhere. He is also stuck with Rukia, as she can not return to her world without powers, and she is not very familiar with this world either. Plus there is this mistery plot around the shinigami that everyone is involved into, yet knows nothing about. Even though the key concept is pretty usual, the series are nifty -at least during season one- mostly because of the secondary characters and the underlying humour. Ichigo is basically the tormented teenager, but his friends, Orihime, the quincy and Urahara are hilarious, and, once in the Seritei, captains like Shunshui, the 11th squad or Kuukaku and her brother really made my day. There are also pretty cool combat scenes, but I'd stick to Yoruichi and SoiFon shunpo combat, in pure jiajutsu style, without swords and toys, basically because you get to see most of the hits. And the intro sequences are the best design I've seen in anime. Too bad they decided to switch to a different style in the stupid, stupid bounto saga, where all you get is angst and emo characters and none of the absurdity and weirdness of season one. Just like Dragon Ball a decade ago. Maybe the hollow saga is better, but I haven't gathered the resolution to go back to the series after the bounto fiasco.



Now, something different: Great Teacher Onizuka. This Onizuka guy used to be the leader of a gang of bikers when he was a teen, but now he is older and supposed to do something with his life. He decides to become a teacher, mostly because he will get to see lot of girls in short skirts: too bad he does not have the qualifications. Still, Onizuka has something that most teachers don't: an understanding of the students. During a work interview, the director of a school notices that and decides to hire him ... to teach the hardest group in the place. These guys have already sent into depression 4 or 5 teachers and none lasted more than 2 months, but Onizuka manages to win them one by one and to discover the secret behind the class behavior, and, at the same time, solves their problems and makes a fool of himself again and again and again in front of (one among many) the girl he likes (sometimes). This anime is fun, fun, fun and some of the episodes are really good at storytelling.



Back to fantasy, but no swords, Full Metal Alchemy has a nifty plot. These guys, Alfonz and Edward, start to dabble with alchemy to impress their mom after their dad, a very famous alchemist, leaves one day. Too bad her mom gets sick and dies, because they decide to bring her back from the dead using alchemy, but forget about its most important rule: equivalent exchange. In order to get something, you must pay with something of the same value. The experiment is a disaster: their mother returns as a horrible creature that explodes later, Ed loses an arm and a leg and Alfonz's body evaporates and his soul gets bonded to a golem armor to prevent him from dying. Wenry, the kid's neighbour and a hot shot at mechanics (go engineers,go!), provides some limbs for Ed and her granny takes them into their home, but in time they decide to leave and join the army so they can become alchemists and find the philosopher stone. Their goal is to use it to recreate Alfonz's body, but it is easier said than done. First, the army is not as clean as one might (or might not :)) think. Then, there is something really disturbing about the stone and anyone involved with it. Also, there is this strange murderer after alchemists. And, besides, who are the very mysterious homunculus? In this case, a simple plot that turns out not to be so simple after a few chapters and becomes rather complex, but coherent. Plus secondary characters are great, as usual, and the art is pretty good.



If you want to look for something really weird, try Dokuro Chan. She is a guardian angel from the future who comes to the current days with her bat Excaliborg to ... help(???) the main character, a shy teenager who likes a school mate (and any other female in the series, he's a teen, after all). Her help basically consists of killing him in the goriest possible way to bring him back to life later each time he does or say (or whatever) something that displeases her. There is also Sabatto-chan, the evil angel from the future who is supposed to kill the guy, but she is so useless when compared to murderous Dokuro that she gives pity. Plus everthing bad in the series not happening to the main character will most likely go her way. This anime might not be your choice, there are some scenes I laught at, but all in all I can't exactly get in the mood to watch this. It is like Bobobo, you either like it or hate it, only I don't like Bobobo at all: too strange for my taste.



Finally, Monster is one of the best series I've seen. It goes about this hot shot surgeon who likes life easy and won't quarrel with anyone, rather sheepishly obeying his boss and girlfriend, until one of these orders make him choose between the life of a rich man and a poor worker who had, in fact, arrived earlier. After thinking on how his ideals went corrupt, he has a second choice: the major of the town or a 7-years old kid with a gun shot on the head. This time he goes for the kid and the major dies. He loses his job, girlfriend and social position ... until his boss and superiors die poisoned that very same night and he is chosen head or surgery. It turns out 10 years later that the kid was, in fact, already a very dangerous sociopath and he had saved his life, so he is, in part, responsible for the many people he had killed in the last decade ... and will kill in the future. Again, he has to make a decision: leave the hospital and go find the killer, Johann, to finish him ... if he is capable of. From this point on, the anime becomes a superb road movie with hundreds of secondary characters and a very dark underlying story.



Not too bad for someone who only watched three anime series as a teen: Dragon Ball (of course), Saint Seiya (tea time) and Sailor Moon (they ran it during breakfast, guess stomach rules my TV :D). Dragon Ball was pretty cool during the first dozen episodes, up until the first martial arts competition. I laughted and laughted with the secondary characters and Goku's ignorance about practically anything. However, as soon as it became a neverending circle of "get more power - smash your fiend - find someone stronger to beat you up" and back again, I hated it. The deepest character in the series at the point was probably Goku's bo. Saint Seiya was pretty cool, with the armors, and the fights and everything, only it was always the same: Athena got captured by some unknown enemy that put her into a deadly trap and gave the saints 24 hours to free her. These guys would go against the baddies one by one, rather than smashing them together. Seiya's technique would basically be to let the others beat him up until they were too tired or too disgusted with his blood to go on and then finish them. Eventually, they'd free Athena and unmask the bad guy, who would vanish in thin air. The first time, it worked for me. The second -Asgard saga- was even better in terms of character development (the baddies were not that bad and such), but it was exactly the same. At Poseidon saga, I decided to just give up. Sailor Moon is a different matter, I can't recall much about the plot, because I only caught parts of the episodes with my coffe and cookies, but I just could not help by laugth with the transformations and little speeches of this main character, the Moon Warrior or whatever. I still remember her in the middle of a concert where the cello had gone nuts (and alive, of course) and massacred equally the band and the bystanders, but she would not do anything until the thing accidentally steps on a pot and then it goes like "For killing that little innocent flower, I won't forgive you. Moon, give me your powers!!" HAHAHAHA! It's true, unlike people flowers are really cool xDxD



I'm thinking about Samurai Champloo or Death Mask next ...

Just when you were thinking about giving up on TV comedies, you get something new and fresh like this!

Spaced is a comedy by Simon "Shaun of the dead" Pegg and Jessica Stevenson, who are forced to pretend they are a couple to rent an apartment. It must be like the freakiest thing I've seen in years, and it is beautifully filmed (up to the point I actually noticed), plus all actors are superb (specially the leading two, but never forget about the supporting cast). There are references to basically every film, TV series, comic and book I like and in some episodes (still need to watch season 2) I just could not stop laughing through two or three scenes in a row.

What can I say, I even love its music! If you liked IT Crowd, you'll love Spaced (not the same at all, but take my word for it). Go watch it now!

After barely 15 years of waiting, I finally got Federico Mendelsson Bartholdy full adventures in hard cover and all! Okay, I had them all in strips back from the time when they were published in CIMOC (that I conveniently bougth second hand in Madrid), but handling a few kilos to read them all in a row was not the best choice. I still need to get biceps to read the Narnia deluxe edition with illustrations and everything ... :D

And that's my fault for watching the morning news every day. Today we get an all nice strike on the judicial system. Wanna know why? Some time ago, a judge (or so he claims) -Rafael Tirado- lets this child molester go free even though he was convicted. The reasons he would plead later? Because he had too much work. Me, I have too much work and need to go for extra-hours. A judge can simply let people walk by, guilty or not, and go home happily. Whatever the reasons, the guy does not waste time, moves to the south and kidnaps and kills a 5 years old girl. Now, they realize that he should not have been free (not morally speaking here, LEGALLY) at the time and they ask for responsibilities to this judge guy. He just says that he had too much work, as commented, and his fellow judges decide that he should get some punishment. The price for getting a kid killed? 1500 EUR, it seems justice is on sale, lately. But ok, you just think for yourself justice is a f**** sh** in this country and go on with your life. Only yesterday vicepresident de la Vega dares to say that the judge should have had a harder punishment ... and guess what? NOW the judicial power IS MOBILIZED. On strike. Because they think that we should not have an opinion on how they work to avoid putting pressure on them!! Or maybe they mean "expressing" an opinion, because after the 1500 EUR sentence, I guess they don't give a s* about what we think. The same guys who spend hours giving their own opinion on politics and government on TV, even though they are supposed to be a separare power!!! And they'll tell us how much work they have later ... What a country

Wanted

... better than expected. True, I was not expecting much, but it was fun anyway. FX left aside (which was good), there was a story and everything. It had not much to do with the comics, but it was ok. However, Jolie looks so thin in the movie that is not amazing that she can dodge bullets -



3:10 to Yuma
This flick had one big attraction point to me: Christian Bale. And, yep, he does a cool anti-hero. Crowe is cool too, in his role as outlaw. This is, obviously, a remake, so nothing new under the sun. It is a bit slow, also, but all in all, ok. In this kind of western, I stick to LAST TRAIN TO GUN HILL (1959), with Kirk Douglas, which goes on the same lines (train to be reached with strong opposition to get a criminal to justice, small town to wait for it ...) but, somehow, has more action from my humble point of view. It does not have Bale, though :P

I wanna see Nim and maybe Mirrors now ...

This one goes in spanish because there are some gags that only local readers will catch. Sorry guys, I'll switch back to english next time :)

Pongamonos en situacion ... Tarde de rol en casa, 5 amiguetes, dos botellas de refrescos, 12 bolsas de patatas fritas y un puñao de dados de esos con muchas caras.

-¿Hoy a que jugamos?
-¡Al 5 anillos!
-No, eso ya fue la semana pasada
-Pues al Cthulhu
-No, que no encaja con mi proximo bestseller
-Pues al ... Indiana Jones
-Mira, eso puede valer. ¿Que personaje quieres ser?
-Voy a ser un PJ pedante, magnifico en su area, cargado de desden para la gente que lo rodea y, en general, encantado de conocerse a si mismo.
-Vale, pos ereeeeees ... una experta hacker millonaria y despreciativa.
-Puedo ser un personaje masculino?
-Como quieras, total, lo voy a tratar igual ...
-Bueno, pues el resto seran mis amigos, que, por alguna razon, me adoran y admiran y son muy buenos en lo suyo, aunque no tanto como yo.
-Vale, mientras tengan algun rasgo folklorico-festivo que ayude en la partida.
-Ok, esta es monja, este marine colonial y el otro sobrino de Fu-man-chu y cinturon celeste de Jeet Kung Do
-Si, puede funcionar. Vamos a ver, como te motivo para salir de tu acomodada vida. Tienes algun pariente a que salvarle el pellejo? Te aburres mortalmente? Tienes dificultades economicas?
-Si, vale, lo primero me vale
-Pues recibes un mensaje muy angustiado de tu primo segundo, escrito en una clave rarisima que nadie puede leer, salvo tu, cuando saques un critico en entender claves ...
-Critico!
-Pues eso, que te pide que lo ayudes, que lo ha secuestrado un nucleo de antiguos pobladores de la Isla de Pascua que adoran al dios de Mauna Loa -uno de los volcanes más activos en las Islas Hawaianas y uno de los cinco volcanes que forman la isla de Hawai junto con los volcanes Mauna Kea, Hualalai, Kohala y Kilauea-
-Eso no tiene sentido!
-Tu dame diez minutos con la wikipedia y veras como consido encontrarlo
-Bueeeenoooo, pues me pido 7 dias de asuntos propios, liquido mis bonos del tesoro, le doy cerrojazo a casa, regalo el gato y me saco una tarjeta de millas de Iberia, que pa mi que voy a viajar.
-No se te olvide llevarte a tus amigos, que tu no tienes las habilidades de Buscar libros, Arqueologia Aplicada y Caza de Mariposas a topos
-¿Caza de Mariposas a topoooos?
-(Ya veras, ya, cuando descubras que Ghengis Khan tatuo media solucion del enigma en las alas de un morpho (mariposa tropical iridiscente de la familia Nymphalidae que es nativa de Centro y Sudamérica.)

Pues esto, que parece una partida de rol de lo mas normalita, no es mas que el comienzo ... de otro libro de Matilde Asensi!!!
No es broma, hasta ahora me he leido El Ultimo Caton, el Origen Perdido y ahora estoy con Todo Bajo el Cielo y casi convencida de que esta mujer escribe asi. No me quejo, que me gustan sus libros mucho mas que los del pazguato del Dan Brown que cuando se le habla de documentacion, saca el carnet de identidad. Quitando que todos sus protagonistas me caen mal, sus libros son bastante entretenidos y estan mas que bien documentados (a veces quizas en exceso, pero mas vale que sobre ...). Vamos, que son como el libro gordo de Petete en version novela historica. Eso si, sus personajes tienen los mejores criticos en dados que nunca he visto en partida alguna. ¡¡Vaya partidas les salen!!

Me vuelvo con Todo bajo el cielo :D:D

Okidoki, I've been to the cinema these last months and I can't say I'm much impressed.
Let's start with the good staff: Batman. This film is amazing and Nowlan is superb; he seems to be the only director that actually has read the comics before
shooting the film. There are these references to classics like Year One, Full Circle, Killing Joke ... And most characters, we are familiar with, even though I
don't know why they renamed Montoya as Ramirez. The cartoon shorts prior to the film were also a good idea to get into the story smoothly and, then, the Joker was
great. I was not much into Ledger -and, let's acknowledge, I always had a thing for Bale and I did not like all merit going to other guy- but he did a perfect, scary Joker and even gave the Clown the black humour twist that was needed at the hospital scene. The script was seamless and the story smooth. Loved it.



Wall-e was also (not surprisingly) pleasant. Along with the perfect technical quality Pixar has us used to, the story was sweet, it has some hilarious moments and characters were very solid. You progressively grow up to like them and care about them, which is something that can not be said for most of the films I watched this summer. All in all, I liked Nemo better, but I'm thinking about building a Wall-e for myself :)



And, now, everything else:

Hancock, for example. What was it all about? Was there really a script int that movie? Did not look like, I'd say. Despite the quite obvious revelation about the two main characters (I'm trying not to be spoily, but never mind, you'll guess it after five minutes), the rest was like "look how nice are my FX", something quite usual lately. Have all good writers gone to TV recently? Ok, Will Smith looks good, specially with the rowdy aspect, but that's basically it (and Theron for you, guys).



Kung Fu Panda was another dissappointment, mostly because I did not like any character. If not for Pixar, we would be back to the time when cartoons were only for kids and, hence, The film goes like most in this genre: you get the main character, who knows nothing at all about kung fu, has no training and no physique to fight, and, just for pure chance, turn him into a hero foreseen in an old prophecy, so he has to grow into his shoes. Sometimes, the way of telling the story makes it big. This is not one of those. After this film, I replayed Disney's Mulan in the DVD and, once more, loved every minute. I think I'll stick just to Pixar and DC cartoons until they remember how to shoot stories without real actors.



Mamma mia was marginally enjoyable. Meryl Streep was not much my idea of the main character, but the three guys were okay and music was fun. I rather preferred the theater version, though, but it was the only movie they played at the beach were I was not constantly checking my watch to go back home.



The biggest dissappointment was Hellboy and the Golden Army, though. As a fan of Hellboy from the beginning, one can only wonder how Mignola let them mess with continuity like that. Money, most likely, as sad as it sounds. Why on earth would he have the (disfunctional) family composed by Abe, Liz, Kate and the rest loose meaning just to have a (quite poor) romance on the screen? It was bad in the first movie, in this one is unacceptable. Plus Hellboy looks like a rebel (and rather spoiled) teenager rather than a grown-up. Responsability goes straight away to Liz, as Abe seems to be quite lost and Manning looks bipolar or something . Since when has Liz been the poster girl for stability?? As many friends told me, the film looks pretty, specially when there are fairies on screen, but it would have been better without the Bureau, as they all are out of character. This is a Del Toro movie where they stuffed Hellboy by sheer force, and that's the best I can say about it.



And finally, on DVD, there are these two flicks one can live without:

The seed of evil: a thai movie about a mythical monster created by ill employed dark arts. The monster is not that scary, but the first part of the film, on kid prostitution in Bangkok, is really creepy. And, sadly, quite realistic.



Tideland, by Terry Gilliam, is a totally different thingy. Author movies might work sometimes for me, but this one was disturbing and disgusting. It focus on the depressing live of a ten year kid, only daughter of a couple of junkies (Jeff Bridges in the rol of daddy). After the mom (Jenniffer Tilly) dies from overdose, Bridges and the kid move to a very isolated area in the country side, where his mother had an old farm house. There, of course, Bridges gets overdosed as well and the kid is left alone to her fantasies. As usual with Giliam, a descent into madness from an unusual point of view. Nothing I'd advise someone with my movie tastes to watch, I warn you.



On the other hand, Galactica Razor was quite cool. We get the whole cast shortly after the Pegasus goes under Adama control. If you have not seen season 2, I'd advise you not to read any further, mind you. When Cain is murdered by poor, tortured Number-6, her crew is adrift, now under command of young Lee, who has not a strong position after command has been granted by his dad. Lee makes a smart move and selects one of Cain's trusted officers as second in command. The problem is that the woman is mentally damaged after obeying the commands that led to a civil massacre in Scylla when Cain wanted the FTL motors stolen from the ships. After a small crew gets lost while scouting around and Adama recalls that Cylons were experimenting with vivisection back during the first war, rescue will put this woman and Starbuck into an uneasy alliance. Plus we get to learn why Cain was always so pissed during the two Pegasus episodes.



Next time, we go to TV series! Cheers from the Caribe!!